Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Random Musings

Garrett is just 14 days shy of his 9 month birthday. In just a few short months, my little man is going to be a year old. It's just amazing to me that the little person that started out so teeny-tiny is now crawling all over the place and getting into everything. He pulls up on our lowest stair and I just KNOW he is contemplating just how he can get up those stairs. With all the big "milestones" he has hit in these past few months, I can't help but think about all the precious moments he has had in the past 9 months, and all the adventures that await for us in the future. Okay, unsentimental types (this means you, Daddy-O!) should probably just stop reading here. I am going to be a complete mushball female for a change!

I will never forget the first time he said mama and dada.

I will forever cherish the evening walks the three of us take together--we will only be able to carry him in our arms for so much longer. The look of pure contentment on his face as we walk around the neighborhood, greet our neighbors, or just enjoy a peaceful night, is priceless.

I HOPE I never forget that toothless grin that he gives everyone, the one that melts my heart and makes my little guy so endearing to anyone who meets him. I will probably cry when he gets his first tooth.

I will always remember the night a few weeks back, when we were working on our sleep training, and I laid outside Garrett's shut door, listening to him chat to his toys. What was he telling them? What was he thinking about? I hope that he can live every day of his life with the same energy and joy that he had in his voice as he talked to his toys.

While the "arrangement" we have that allows me to be for the most part a work-at-home mom is often stressful and exhausting, there is no way (or dollar amount) in the world to quantify what it is like to be with my guy every day. So what if i was at work till 2am yesterday, and spent half the evening on the phone with my boss. I also got to read to Garrett before every nap, and worked on the floor next to him while he played. Now that I have an awsome sitter to watch him as-needed, I can truely have the best of both worlds.

I left my son with a babysitter the other day, and told Brad I couldn't imagine having to do that every day--I know lots of moms do it because they must, not because they want to, and I am blessed not to have to do it all the time. Brad looked at me and said "I do it every day." That's probably the first time it has occurred to me how hard it is to be a daddy. I can understand how tough it is for working moms, but it never even occurred to me that it is hard on dads. I have always thought of moms as the ones that do it all, and I guess I forgot how hard it must be for Brad to walk out that door every morning, before Garrett even gets up, and know that it would be 13 hours until he could see him, hold him, and see his cute smile. And that an hour was all he would get before it was time to bed. Maybe that's the first time I really understood what it is to be a dad.

One of the girls who is on a community board I post on wrote on her blog that this V-day, her heart expanded to belong to three boys instead of 1 (she has twins). That is so true. My guys have my whole heart, its such an amazing thing. I look forward to first unassisted steps, first sentances and all the stuff that comes after--teeball and soccer, school, girls and someday a family of his own. Its just so amazing how they transform from this tiny little being to their own person. Part of me wishes he would stay just as he is forever, and part of me can't wait to see the child, and later man, that he will become.

Okay, done now :-D I am allowed one sentimental post every now and then. It is, after all, what being a mom is all about!

1 comment:

Chrystal said...

He gets cuter every month...if that's even possible!